I, Christian

Let me just say that I love you; you are loved, bright, beautiful, fantastic, giving, amazing, and you have the peace of God, and you are my brothers and sisters in the body of Christ our Lord. Even if you do not feel that way, that’s exactly what you are.

St. Paul says Christ empowers us in our inner beings to experience the fullness of God's love. That enables us to live with gentleness, patience and forgiveness within the diversity of community. Such a centered life is powerful and empowering to others. (Italics mine.)

Jesus was a servant. He went about serving God, and the people by teaching and spreading the Gospel. He showed us by example of how to live in glory, to pray, and to gain salvation. He was also poor, marginalized, beaten, scrutinized, and almost stoned. He was shouted at, hurtful things were said to him, he was crucified, died, and was buried all because he and his ways were different from everyone else. Then Jesus rose from the dead, ascended into Heaven, and sits at the right hand of God the Father. He made the ultimate sacrifice for us all. His blood was shed for us so that we could live in eternity. We have a blood bought right to be saved from sin, and live in the Glory of God for His Glory. Wow! What a man! What an amazing love!

Just as Jesus was a servant, so are we. When we make the decision to take up our cross and follow Christ, being saved, we are serving those around us as He did. For me, accepting that I was gay took what felt like an eternity. Once I realized that I am who I am, and God loves me no matter what, and that He made me, I was okay with it. I discovered that my sexuality, a gift from God, was my cross, and became so because I refused to let bigotry, hatred, people’s lack of understanding and fear undermine my love and devotion to Christ, and decided to follow Him, and to seek and serve Him in all persons. It’s hard. There are people who would rather die than to be served by a homosexual. It’s tragic. Those of us who have been treated like Jesus, and sadly to say, even to the point of death, who are servants know in our hearts that we served Him by being a Christ like example.

God knows our hearts. He knows our pain, and He knows how we grieve and most importantly he loves us unconditionally, another gift that can never be taken away. Remember that the Bible says “come to me all who travail and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” Trust in Him, my friends. Trust that when you pray to God for help, forgiveness, or whatever need you may have, He is listening and already working on it for you. God is a God of mercy and love and does not willingly afflict His children.

If something or someone grieves your spirit, and you know when it happens, I say to you pray. Pray for those that did it, and maintain your humility. God wants us to be happy and will help us to be happy when we ask in Jesus’ name. Discovering I was gay and accepting it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. Then there was the process of telling those I knew could handle it. I lost a few friends and was treated differently by some who I thought were my friends. Deep depression and fear followed. I felt I was condemned by God to Hell, even though I was a Christian. I asked Jesus to be in my heart a hundred times, and still felt I was doomed. God and I had a few screaming matches (it was me screaming and crying) and He listened. I finally realized after so much prayer and depression that I was okay, I was normal. I was human, a child of God, and loved. I knew that there was a purpose to it all and I knew I was to help people. God doesn’t make mistakes; He makes truth, and love. He takes our ashes and gives us beauty. Give Him your ashes.

After some time and searching I found a church that loved me for me and let me put my talents and gifts to work for God and them. I now have the blessing of singing in the choir, reading the Bible to the congregation, and praying to God on behalf of the congregation. Now God is calling me to a service ministry. What a feeling! What joy! What a God!

How can you be a servant? Live and love as Christ lived and loved. He commanded us to “love one another as I have loved you.” By doing this, and seeking and serving Christ in all persons, you are not only serving the Lord, you are serving each other. “The greatest thing, you’ll ever learn, is just to love...” Jesus loves you, He needs you, He wants you, He has you. Let Him empower you so you can experience the fullness of God’s love and know that the cross you bear is a cross of love! +Amen.


© Jacob A. Taylor, August, 2005
Song lyrics by Eden Ahbez from: Nature Boy.

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