the eternal wanderer

Some of us …well actually many of us…are wanderers. We have no direction, we’re not sure which way we should head…so we walk and walk, sometimes here, sometimes there. We wait, hope and dream that our wandering will land us somewhere.

So we wander and wait and wander some more and only deal with things that we bump into. Nothing changes, years pass by.
We stop at one place for a short time, get bored and wander someplace else. We’re just wandering.

“Can I help you?”
“No, thanks…I’m just wandering.”

We wander because we're waiting for something...we don't know what. We still haven’t won the lotto, we still don’t have our dream job, no one has come to “discover” us, we haven't found our true love, everything is the same, but we’re just a bit older.

We're just waiting for a sign…waiting for an event…waiting for a feeling, a spark, a revelation, a light bulb…waiting for a life change that doesn’t seem to be happening.

Perhaps it’s because some of us have a hard time making commitments…or the choices aren’t so exciting…so we choose nothing. We think that if we wait long enough, something will happen.  But nothing much happens.

Actually things DO happen...things are always happening around us, ...but we have chosen not to participate in any of them because most of these things are “not what I want.”

"Well, what DO you want?"

"I don't know".

So we pass on opportunities, chances, risks and return to the wandering and waiting.

Or perhaps we're idealistic. Many of us don’t want to start any journey we don’t believe in. It's got to feel absolutely right!

So we wait and wander, most of the time in the same area. We want to move forward, we want to commit to something, but for some reason, it never feels right. But time is passing, and we are still nowhere. Why is it that wanderers are always portrayed wandering in the desert?

Much of our fear is that if we make a commitment, we will be stuck in something that we cannot get out of. We are afraid to be in something we will hate. By avoiding all commitments, we can never be stuck, but we ARE nowhereland.

By wandering, we think we’re trying different things, but most of the time our trying is really just “looking and loitering”. We never really participate. We hope that one day we will wander into something that will kick-start our life.

Wanderers don't want to make wrong choices and they don't want to waste their time and energy. And if they get too involved, they might get in over their they walk in, look and walk out. Easy enough. No hassles, no nothing.

So it is also for many of us who are Christians.
Our spiritual lives mirror our real life.

We recall the story of the Israelites who wandered in the desert endlessly for 40 years, because their hearts were not with God. Their concern was ONLY on why they weren't in the Promised Land and spent all their days complaining to God about it.

Their lack of faith...did them in.

So it is with us. Our spiritual lives are neither here nor there. Our prayers are sporadic. We wander from church to church because every congregation has something wrong with it. Some days we believe, other days we doubt everything. We don't do much...yet we complain that God isn't doing anything for us. Yet we can't figure out why.

NONE of us wants to make wrong decisions and ALL of us want to follow God’s will perfectly, but much of the time, it’s never clear what we should be doing. That is the confusing part.

We can’t move forward… so we don’t move at all.
We desire change…but dislike change…so we don’t change.
Our spiritual lives lose…any sense of spirit.
We don’t challenge ourselves, we don’t take risks, we don’t break out of our safety zones. We don’t do anything.

But that is not the way of the Lord. As Christians we are to move. We are to learn. We are to trust. We are to grow. We are to get our hands dirty. We are to do that which makes us uncomfortable. We are to change the world. But we have to start with God first.

Start by questioning and talking to God and find out what it is that is keeping you wandering...away from Him. Seek to understand His love for us, the world, and what He would have us do. Jesus asks us to follow Him, and His ways require us to do things: To pray, to trust, to forgive, to heal, to minister, to love.

When we seek God, we start internal work that we cannot wander away from. When we follow His ways, we'll have to make choices that require our commitment and that means, staying in one place.

Isn’t that the core fear of the wanderer?
To be stuck in one place. To not be able to wander anymore?

Perhaps. But you won’t find your life until you start with God.

When we love, trust and follow God with all of our hearts and souls and minds, we will find His purpose for us and mankind, and in doing so, He will lead us to exactly what we have been looking for.

Keep faith wherever you go and instead of wandering aimlessly, keep your eyes on Jesus and walk straight towards Him.

He will take you to the Promised Land.


© 2006 Edrick

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