The Pain of Loss
It was after the Memorial Weekend that our good friend Bruce Gerig passed away. He wrote extensively for the Epistle and had his own section devoted to uncovering what the Scriptures really said about homosexuality. He was a lively man who was generous in his concern for others and always tried to help if anyone was in need and if he couldn't help, he prayed. He was loved by those who knew him and he will be greatly missed. One comment from a friend was that she thought he would be around forever. I am in agreement with that.
And so it is with loss.
We think everything in our lives will last forever, whether our jobs, situations, family, friendships or relationships, we always think things will always stay the same. But the truth is everything eventually changes, and some changes involve losing people in our lives altogether...the hardest change for us to take.
Changes concerning people we love cause the most turmoil in our lives because they cannot be replaced. When relationships are broken, when the person we care for is no longer there…our hearts empty out to a hollow shell. There is no one else to replace the one person who we loved and loved us.
Along with our loss comes the loneliness, sadness, pain and grief which can remain in our hearts for a long time.
This painful loss can be as debilitating as a car crash, changing our lives in ways we never wanted. No one can ever really understand how much pain comes along with the loss of losing someone we love. It is sometimes too much for us to deal with, but in order to function, we must tuck away our pain. But it is a hard thing to do. Healing can take months, years and even decades.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 says it best:
There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
People drift in and out of our lives every day and special people are rare. In God's plan there is a purpose for everyone who enters into our lives. Some persons come in only for a moment while others become a permanent fixture. Everyone who enters into our lives are there for a reason. Some persons teach us things, some change us for the better, while others bring us companionship, love and joy. For each person who enters our life, there is a reason and a season.
Nothing can take away the pain and loss that we feel when a person we love is gone from us. We can't bring them back or relive the past, but as Christians, we can go the Lord to tell him how we feel and He will comfort us.
In John 11: 1-44, we read the story of the Death of Lazarus. Even though Jesus came to raise Lazarus from the dead, Jesus saw those who loved Lazarus weeping and His spirit became troubled and He also wept for him (John 11:35). That is because Jesus loves as we love and feels our loss. Our grief, our pain, our heartache...is felt and known by Jesus. That is the kind of Saviour we have. One who feels the feelings of our heart, and weeps with us when we have fallen into despair and in pain.
All we can do is thank the Lord for bringing these persons to us to have and love for a season. And we know that because of them, we are better people to have known them.
And though we mourn that some persons we will never see again, I believe that on that day when we are all with the Lord God, there will be a Great Reunion when we will again see all the people we loved and who loved us. Forgiveness will abound, pain and heartache will vanish and we will be one with God and each other. This I believe is why it is called Heaven.
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