Coming Back To God

GLBT People are very spiritual people. We have been through so much in our lives, dealing with so many issues as we’ve come to terms with our sexuality, that looking within is part of what has given us our strength. But within this process, many GLBT people have given up on God and have had to rely on our own. Many of us were Christians in our youth and the reality of God has never left us. But the disappointment of thinking that God has let us down can be devastating to us who realized that yes we are gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender. We’ve all suffered a wide range of feelings. We feel abandoned by God. We feel we are weak failures. We feel guilty for who we are. We feel angry because we think God doesn’t seem to care. Our sense of self has been uprooted and many of us are still raw to the touch.

And though much time has passed and many of us have healed to a point that we can look in the mirror and understand who we are…we still miss the relationship we used to have with God.
That close feeling that He cares for us, that He understands us and that He is watching over and protecting us as only the Creator of the Universe can.

And because of our disappointment with the church and feeling that God also rejects us, a lot of us have taken the road to believing in NOTHING.
Which is why the culture has become about pleasure, sex, fashion, travel, design, fitness, looks, coolness… everything…except personal spiritual growth.
People in the GLBT community don’t want to tell the others in the community to be spiritual…because they know that it all goes back to meeting up with God.
So the GLBT culture IGNORES GOD. They close their eyes so they don’t have to look at the spiritual side of us, which is really our most important side.

It’s a sad paradox.

Because of the lack of God or personal responsibility,
the GLBT culture has run amok to do anything we want.
But is this good? Are we really free?
The church has now become the enemy and Christianity has become the religion of bigoted unsympathetic control freaks.
So many GLBT people now turn to the other religions for some kind of spiritual direction to replace the empty space within, whether it be Self Improvement, Eastern religions, A Course in Miracles, Yoga or Meditation,
GLBT people are searching.

The truth is God wants us. He loves us.
He’s never abandoned us.
The church has convinced us that God rejects us.
But that is not the truth.We know that in our hearts.
But most of us are just too exhausted to go back to that “dialogue”.
We just want to be free. We just want to be able to breathe
and not feel caged anymore.
I understand. It’s just easier to let it all go.

But…we still have that empty space.
That feeling that we are missing something.
Though we try to fill that space with friends, a busy career or a lover…we can’t escape that loneliness. And I’m not talking about that feeling of not having people around.
I’m talking about that sense of isolation when we are by ourselves. That feeling that we are totally alone in the world. The loneliness that not even a million friends or the most perfect lover could ever fill.

Well…God is right there, waiting for us.
Coming back to God doesn’t have to be a drama.
Coming back to God is a beautiful peaceful thing,
because we are returning to the Creator of love.
Coming back to God is coming back home.
God created every bit of you and wants to perfect you.
He doesn’t want to change you in a bad way.
He wants you to come to Him so He can make you the best you can be. He’s not giving you rules to keep you down, but He’s giving you His commandments to love God and love your neighbor. And within these commandments, you can blossom to be a beautiful person. Because when you come back to God, you also become a part of His plan of love for the world.
We learn to respect Him. We learn to respect the world He created. We learn to respect His people. And we learn to respect ourselves.

And when we love our neighbors as ourselves, we learn to treat others with dignity, honor and fairness. We learn to help people in need. We learn to not be selfish, hateful or bitter, but loving and giving…all good things that God wants for us.

And God soothes our souls. He comforts us.
He forgives us. He gives us peace again.

Coming back to God is easy.
Don’t worry about your past or things you’ve done.
God knows all about it. And He understands.
Don’t be afraid of Him. Talk to Him.
He still loves you.

© 2004 Edrick

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